Control wise, New International Track and Field replaces the impossible-without-a-turbo button mashing controls and replaces them with an equally as difficult touch interface. After picking Yoko -- one of the game's original, punk rock female characters -- I had a pretty tough time competing against CPU characters in the 100 Meter Dash. This particular game involved rubbing the DS stylus across the screen on an arrow track, but regardless of how fast or how accurate I seemed to be, I simply couldn't keep up.

"No *bleep*ing way are we getting this game," my wife said to me, concerned for the condition of our own handheld, as she watched me go crazy on the DS touch screen with the stylus. "I don't care how it good it is."